Patience

This is one of the biggest misconceptions about homeschool moms and/or big families: we corner the market on patience. Moms often comment, "Oh I don't have the patience for that!"

Patience is a fruit of the Spirit. It's the Holy Spirit's limitless patience that we have available. A lot of pastors jokingly say that we should never pray for patience because you're just asking for trouble. I think that's a bunch of bologna. Patience is a free gift. Patience is also a by-product of wisdom that God gives freely without finding fault. Patience is not something that falls on you if you're lucky or something you can run out of. Patience is there for the taking. If you find yourself feeling about to burst, pray. And ask the kids to pray too!

Endangered Minds

I've been recently devouring "Endangered Minds" by Jane Healy, Ph.D. and learning so much about TV's affect on children's little developing brains. Pretty shocking stuff! To bottom line it for you: watching television actually shapes a child's growing brain. It literally changes the physical shape of their brain. The author's point is that there is nothing learned from educational TV that cannot be better learned from human interaction. I had always assumed that the reason parents are discouraged from letting young children watch a lot of TV is because that is time not spent 1:1 with the child. That isn't the point. The point is, it is actually detrimental to the growing brain. Ack!

While discussing the developing brain, the author also mentioned several substances that negatively affect neurodevelopment. She specifically mentions mercury, aluminum, and formaldehyde as hazardous substances to the brain. These are all very common ingredients in childhood vaccines! For a list of vaccine ingredients by manufacturer, go here. The more I learn, the more I wonder why when it comes to what is best for my child, I would take someone else's word for it! In America, we believe a person with higher education must have our best interests at heart. What about education makes one full of integrity?? I don't think doctors are evil, by the way. No, actually I do. They have hearts full of sin just like the rest of us. "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. . ." It is truly frightening, however, how often we trust what others tell us to do, without ever researching it for ourselves. "Question everything" always seemed like such a negative mantra, but I'm beginning to learn it's also a smart one.

If you want more information about vaccines (how they are made, what they're made with, risks vs. benefits of the vaccines and the diseases), check out this site.

Edited to add: A friend just told me about a great book, Vaccines: the Risks, the Benefits, the Choices. The webpage also lists several other helpful books on the subject.

Simplify Your Load (the full article)

I love finding ways to simplify my life. Any tip I find that will make my life easier, I am all over it! Some of the best tips I use are related to laundry. I’ll now share the wisdom and creativity I worked so hard to steal from someone else.

My kids 5 and older do their own laundry. I’ve put stickers on the control panel of the washer and dryer so they know where to turn the dials. With the stepstool that stays in the laundry room, it isn’t hard for them to reach the knobs. We don’t sort clothes at all. All our clothes are washed in cold water, so nothing bleeds. Towels and sheets are washed in hot water.
In my laundry room are two baskets: one for stained items and one for clothes that need ironing. Instead of treating one stain at a time, I’ve found it much more efficient to collect the stained items until they make a small load. Then I let the washer fill with hot water, plenty of Oxy-Clean and the stained items. After an all night soaking, they all look amazing and I only have to turn the washer on to finish the job. Oxy-Clean is my best friend in the laundry room. Dawn liquid is my other buddy since it’s perfect for grease stains.
My girls wash their clothes on Tuesdays; the boys wash theirs on Wednesdays. I wash my husband’s and mine and that’s all. For a family of nine, my (laundry) load is light!
When the washer finishes, I remind the kids to move their wash to the dryer. (I didn’t want you to think they don’t need me at all!) When the dryer bell dings, they bring their load into the den and start folding while I read to them. Recently we’ve been reading Mary Poppins, so folding laundry is no chore to them; it’s just something to keep their hands busy while they listen to a story they love. Each of the kids has their own mini laundry basket we call their “clean basket”. As they fold their own clothes, they put them into their clean basket. Then instead of taking turns putting away one item at a time from a big laundry basket, they only put away their own small stash. This saves an impressive amount of time and the task of putting away laundry now seems more doable.
Another big tip I learned from big families is to limit the amount of clothes my kids have. It seems so simple, but so many of the clothes they own rarely get worn. Why am I keeping clothes they don’t wear? Generally the answer is because I’ve developed an emotional attachment to an item of clothing! I bought a dress at a great sale. It doesn’t quite fit right, but sure is adorable and I got it for a steal! This kind of silly thinking keeps their drawers overstuffed and their closets crammed. I realized as I was de-cluttering recently that my son had almost 10 dress shirts. Does he really need to go through an entire season without ever wearing the same church shirt twice?? Considering that there’s a charity calling every week or so wanting my discards, I may as well load up that box with good clothes we’re never going to wear.

Miss Blessing (the full article)

When I first began home schooling, I thought a lot about my goals for my children and how that would affect how I educated them. My educational goal for them is to develop a love of learning. Goals affect strategy. I hope to develop a love of learning in my children by making learning fun. I go out of my way to avoid burnout in myself and my kids. But then, this is just my short-term goal.
My long-term goal for my kids is that they grow up to become godly mothers and fathers. Notice I did not say “successful businessmen and career women.” This goal has a tremendous impact on my teaching strategies. One of the key ways I prepare my children to be loving mothers and fathers in the future is teaching them selflessness.
My kids have one job. Of course, they do chores each day, and I definitely expect them to be active participants in their schooling. But they only have one very important job: to be a blessing to their siblings. When they are arguing or bickering, I ask them: Are you doing your job? This simple question is quite powerful in bringing about quick conviction.
I look for ways they can learn to serve. I frequently whisper in one’s ear: “Would you be a blessing and refill your brother’s cup?” or “Would you be a blessing and help your sister put away her clothes?” When I do catch one of them in service, I rave! “Look everyone! Isaac saw that none of us had drinks with dinner and he filled all our glasses!” Then we all say in unison: “Thank you, Mr. Blessing!” Of course, Isaac loves this attention and praise and he will look for ways to be Mr. Blessing again the next day.
When I see one of my kids do something kind, I pull them aside and tell them: “You are being such a servant. I’m so proud of how loving you are becoming.” I want my children to value servanthood, so I am deliberate in weaving this into everything we do.
Sometimes I lose my focus in my endless determination to check everything off my home school to-do list. However, when I remember my ultimate goal to raise loving mommies and daddies, my days go more smoothly and I have a sense of accomplishment regardless how many new facts we have learned. There is a saying that a dying man never says, “I wish I’d spent more time at the office.” I believe when home school parents die, they won’t say, “I wish I’d had my kids read one more book.” The love of knowledge is a God-given gift, but character development is more pleasing to Him.

Enjoying the Fall

Kyle is out with Ed and Paul today, working on fixing up a friend's house so she can sell it. She lives 3 hours away, so he and the guys took off at 7am this morning. So, today I took the kids to the park. The weather is so nice; they've been spending at least 2 hours/day outside lately. This week we officially started our Fall Halftime schedule (not really a break from school, but a slow-down!) We do the most school work during the hot summer and cold winter, so that we can take a break when the weather's nice. (Don't you just love the freedom of homeschooling??) They had so much fun today--running, playing and getting dirty.

What is a Keeper at Home?

The term "homemaker" can be misconstrued, to be sure, so even as we seek to define what a godly keeper at home is, we must also uproot the deeply entrenched stereotypes of what a housewife or "homemaker" is not--or should not be.
A godly keeper at home is absolutely not a lesser human being, a mindless robot (remember Stepford Wives?), or a placid doormat under submission to all men; rather, she is created in the very image of God and of equal worth and value compared to man (Genesis 1:26-28). She is the crown of her husband (Proverbs 12:4), a helper suitable for him (Genesis 2:18). Because she
trusts God's wisdom in establishing perfect order for His creation, she willingly submits to her own husband as unto the Lord (Ephesians 5:22-24).

~taken from Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, preface

I've just started reading this book (just got it in the mail this week). I can tell already that it is going to be a great read. More encouraging posts to follow.

A Great Compliment

Isaac got a great compliment today!

The last 15 minutes of karate are spent in discipleship. The instructor talks to them about the importance of obedience, showing respect, going the extra mile, etc. Mr. Parrack is a great Tae Kwon Do instructor, but his heart is building the kids' character. This is why we love this karate class so much.

Anyway, Mr. Parrack asked Isaac to stand in front of the class. Then he asked Isaac to look at everyone, and he asked, "What happened when you looked at them?" Isaac said, "They all smiled." Mr. Parrack explained: "The reason they all smiled at you is because you smiled at them. You're always smiling, Isaac! Everyone loves to be around people who smile. I love seeing you here each week, because your smile always puts me in a great mood."

I was tearing up at this point. I realized that this boy is the Isaac we've been waiting for the past 8+ years. I have always known I wanted an Isaac. It means "laughter" and I just love that. If Elena had been a boy, she would've been named Isaac. Same for Chloe and Lydia. The name came to mean more to us with each girl we birthed. We have always known there was an Isaac out there for us somewhere, so we both knew we weren't "done" after any of our girls.

God obviously had a very special plan for us, as the name Isaac fits our Isaac so perfectly. He really is always smiling. We chose this new name for him after seeing all the photos of him while in the orphanage. Candid or not, he had a great smile in every single photo.

The kids all love to ask what their names mean, in fact they did it just today. When it came to Isaac and he asked what his name meant, I smiled and said: You know what your name means! He got a very sweet, shy smile on his face as he said, "My name means laughter, because I'm always laughing."

God has blessed us so abundantly with all these little blessings. I'm so very grateful for each one.