Words, Words, Words

I have been dubbed Word Girl by some of my friends and family. I love words and I love knowing what they mean. Words mean something to me.

Wanna be a fly on the wall in the Clark house? Here's your chance. Incident #1:

Maya (seeing Julia grab her purse off the couch): JuJu, you can't take my purse! That's, that's. . . THIEVANTRY!

Me (in the kitchen): That's not a word, Maya.

Maya: (laughing) But I like it. Isn't it fancy? Thievantry! So cool!

Me: Still not a word, Maya.

Maya: Don't you like it, Isaac? What do you vote?

Me: in mock frustration: It doesn't work that way, Maya. You can't just make up words!

{another day, another incident}

Me: Snack time! You guys can have half an apple.

Isaac: Can I have a green and a red apple?

Me: Are you going to have 1/4 of each apple?

Isaac: (thinking my ears must need cleaning) No, can I have a green and a red apple?

Me: Well, are you going to have 1/4 of each apple?

Isaac: Oh forget it. You're not understanding me.

Me: Sweetheart, I've asked you twice if you're going to have 1/4 of each apple and you aren't answering me.

Isaac: YES! But can I have a green and a red apple?

Me: Okay.

(Isaac gets out a red apple and cuts it in half.)

Me: Isaac, let me see your snack. Ok, this is only a red apple. I thought you wanted both.

Isaac: No, I wanted to know if we can have the red apples too. I only heard you say we could have green ones.

Me: Then why didn't you ask that? I asked you three times if you were going to have 1/4 of each apple and you said yes.

Isaac: I thought that was another way to say half.

Me: (thinking) Oh my goodness, I'm about to pull my hair out. I gotta call Kyle. (heading to my private office, the master bathroom)

(Kyle, the wise and discerning one, tells me Isaac must not understand the difference between "and" and "or". I love that smart man of mine!)

Me: (back downstairs) Isaac, let me show you something. . .