Friday, June 17, 2011

What Adoption Looks Like Day to Day: Maya

I read recently that adoption is built on pain and loss. That quote rocked me. It's so true, but how infrequently I think about that. It caused me to think about the traits my adoptees have, that come from their painful past.


My Maya is the most patient person I know. She is laid-back, patient, and it takes a whole lot to ruffle her feathers. A whole lot.
This is not just her personality. It's a result of what she's lived through. Growing up, if she was hungry she may or may not have gotten food. When she needed something, she may or may not have gotten it.
- Maya bottles her emotions until she absolutely bursts. She doesn't know how to talk about the things that are brewing in her until they are just too much for her. (Her emotional outbursts are not scary, however, they are actually quite comical because they are so out of character for her.)
For example: During a blow-out a couple weeks ago, she was yelling: I'm trying to calm down, but I just can't!! I said: Can you do anything good on your own?
She immediately answered: No, there's none who are good, no not one. There is none righteous, not even one. (She's quoting from Romans 3)
I said: So can you do good in your own power?
Sweetheart, you need to pray that Jesus will help you to calm down. He is the only righteousness that's in us.
This calmed her down right away. It's amazing to see the power of the Word of God to transform hearts.

- Maya doesn't ask for the things she needs, and if she does, she doesn't repeat the requests. She just tries to get by. It doesn't occur to her that she could get help if she just asked. She just doesn't think that way yet.
For example: I noticed she had band-aids all over her ankles. When I asked her about them, I found out she had cut her legs to smithereens shaving with a cheap razor. The one I had bought for her never cut her legs, but she ran out of razor heads and didn't ask for more.
Another example: Because she left her clothes in the dryer overnight, she had to iron a skirt that had gotten really wrinkly. 20 minutes later, she came downstairs wearing the skirt, still very wrinkly. She couldn't figure out how to turn up the heat on the iron, so after ironing it on warm forever and ever, she gave up. When I asked why she didn't ask me how to operate the iron, she just said: I don't know. I didn't think of that!

Maya, our bonus child, is very easy to love. She is a gift from God to our family.


Nealy said...

Surely Maya will "inherit the earth." She is an amazing and Godly woman-child. She melts my heart!

Kimberly said...

What a wonderful girly, you have on your hands! You are so blessed. Maya is stunningly beautiful!

~Stephanie said...

What a sweetie! I can't wait to see what God has planned for her future!

MommaofMany said...

What amazing insight. It takes some kind of Momma to know just what Scriptures to speak at any one time to help guide a soul to seek the Lord. I admire you!

mommy4 said...

oh Ginger, I am bawling reading this post! what a treasure from heaven you have in her. what a heart! i love her and i don't even know her. i love her reference to Romans when she just didn't know what to do, but run and cling to scripture, the one true comfort.